Obituaries
Lila Mills Ponder Friday
( October 28, 1930 - January 20, 2024 )
Lila Mills Ponder Friday, of Raleigh, N.C., died January 20, 2024.
Born October 28, 1930, in New Orleans, La. to Karl Bramblett and Lila Mills Ponder, Lila lived in Birmingham, Ala. and Forsyth, Ga., before moving to her beloved Miami, Fla. Growing up, Lila loved few things more than cycling to the beach with friends and her brother, John, for a day of swimming and sailing. Even after becoming a Tar Heel, she was always a Miami girl at heart.
An excellent student, she thrived at Miami High School and entered Belhaven College in Jackson, Miss., at age 16. She transferred to the University of North Carolina in 1949 where she majored in English. Lila joined Pi Beta Phi, making many lifelong friends and becoming chapter president. She also swam with UNC’s synchronized swimming club. Lila was inducted into Phi Beta Kappa and the Order of the Valkyries before graduating in 1951.
She met the love of her life, law student John Ralph Friday of Dallas, N.C., on the steps of the U.S. Post Office in Chapel Hill during her first week of class at UNC. They married December 17, 1955, at Shenandoah Presbyterian Church in Miami. John set up his law practice in Lincolnton, N.C., where Lila taught English and engaged in church, civic and cultural activities. In 1959 and 1961, they welcomed their daughters — Susan and Sarah.
A devoted mother, she, with John, encouraged an appreciation of art, music, history and travel. She sewed dresses and draperies, cooked delicious meals and opened their home, Lincolnwood, to friends and family for more than 50 years before moving to Raleigh in 2006. She remained active in politics, supporting John as an attorney and as judge for the N.C. Recorder’s Court, District Court, Superior Court and as an Emergency Judge.
Lila always loved music. She began as a piano accompanist in eighth grade for the Shenandoah Junior High School orchestra, and later played at church, high school dances and other events. She taught elementary school in Miami for one year after graduation, and elementary school and music in Atlanta for two, before Katherine Kennedy Carmichael, UNC’s Dean of Women, invited her back to work for her in Chapel Hill. Here, Lila accompanied a choir of UNC School of Medicine students directed by roommate and friend Betty Ray (McCain). She continued to support the arts throughout her life, helping bring the North Carolina Symphony to Lincoln County schools for the first time, and enjoying ballet, opera, church music, the North Carolina Symphony and Master Chorale.
A voracious reader, Lila helped garner interest and funding for a new Gaston-Lincoln Regional Library, which opened in Lincolnton in 1976. She also served as chair of the State Library Commission of North Carolina, her service honored with The Order of the Long Leaf Pine in January 2002. Other honors and service included 1968 Lincoln County Woman of the Year, helping establish the Lincoln County Museum of History in 1987, Peace College Board of Visitors, Barium Springs Home for Children Board of Directors, N.C. Museum of History Board of Directors, Girl Scouts of the USA, UNC 1951 Reunion Committee, 1989-1992 N.C. District Director for the Carolina Alumni board, and committee member for the Tar Heel Network.
A lifelong Presbyterian, Lila attended Shenandoah Presbyterian Church in her youth. She first attended Camp Montreat for Girls around 1942 and enjoyed the Presbyterian conference center the rest of her life. She became an Elder at First Presbyterian Church in Lincolnton and lived a life of deep faith, courage, peace, kindness and love.
Lila was predeceased by her parents, Karl and Lila Ponder; her husband, the Hon. John Ralph Friday; her brother, John Oliver Ponder (Lucretia); and daughter, Susan Friday Lamb. She is survived by daughter, Sarah Friday Peters, and husband Alexander McClure Peters; son-in-law Terrell Hadley Lamb; four grandchildren — Elizabeth Lamb Poindexter (Matthew), Emily Lamb Viva (Matthew), John Walker Peters and Lila McClure Peters; three great-grandchildren — Cora Watts Poindexter, Mary Friday Poindexter and Graham Alexander Viva; and extended family.
A Service of Witness to the Resurrection will be held at 10 a.m. on Saturday, Jan. 27, 2024, at West Raleigh Presbyterian Church, 27 Horne St., Raleigh, N.C., 27607. A reception will follow. A graveside service will be held at 1 p.m., February 19 at Hollybrook Cemetery, Lincolnton, N.C.
In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to West Raleigh Presbyterian Church, to the UNC-Chapel Hill Department of English & Comparative Literature or to the N.C. Museum of History Foundation.
Born October 28, 1930, in New Orleans, La. to Karl Bramblett and Lila Mills Ponder, Lila lived in Birmingham, Ala. and Forsyth, Ga., before moving to her beloved Miami, Fla. Growing up, Lila loved few things more than cycling to the beach with friends and her brother, John, for a day of swimming and sailing. Even after becoming a Tar Heel, she was always a Miami girl at heart.
An excellent student, she thrived at Miami High School and entered Belhaven College in Jackson, Miss., at age 16. She transferred to the University of North Carolina in 1949 where she majored in English. Lila joined Pi Beta Phi, making many lifelong friends and becoming chapter president. She also swam with UNC’s synchronized swimming club. Lila was inducted into Phi Beta Kappa and the Order of the Valkyries before graduating in 1951.
She met the love of her life, law student John Ralph Friday of Dallas, N.C., on the steps of the U.S. Post Office in Chapel Hill during her first week of class at UNC. They married December 17, 1955, at Shenandoah Presbyterian Church in Miami. John set up his law practice in Lincolnton, N.C., where Lila taught English and engaged in church, civic and cultural activities. In 1959 and 1961, they welcomed their daughters — Susan and Sarah.
A devoted mother, she, with John, encouraged an appreciation of art, music, history and travel. She sewed dresses and draperies, cooked delicious meals and opened their home, Lincolnwood, to friends and family for more than 50 years before moving to Raleigh in 2006. She remained active in politics, supporting John as an attorney and as judge for the N.C. Recorder’s Court, District Court, Superior Court and as an Emergency Judge.
Lila always loved music. She began as a piano accompanist in eighth grade for the Shenandoah Junior High School orchestra, and later played at church, high school dances and other events. She taught elementary school in Miami for one year after graduation, and elementary school and music in Atlanta for two, before Katherine Kennedy Carmichael, UNC’s Dean of Women, invited her back to work for her in Chapel Hill. Here, Lila accompanied a choir of UNC School of Medicine students directed by roommate and friend Betty Ray (McCain). She continued to support the arts throughout her life, helping bring the North Carolina Symphony to Lincoln County schools for the first time, and enjoying ballet, opera, church music, the North Carolina Symphony and Master Chorale.
A voracious reader, Lila helped garner interest and funding for a new Gaston-Lincoln Regional Library, which opened in Lincolnton in 1976. She also served as chair of the State Library Commission of North Carolina, her service honored with The Order of the Long Leaf Pine in January 2002. Other honors and service included 1968 Lincoln County Woman of the Year, helping establish the Lincoln County Museum of History in 1987, Peace College Board of Visitors, Barium Springs Home for Children Board of Directors, N.C. Museum of History Board of Directors, Girl Scouts of the USA, UNC 1951 Reunion Committee, 1989-1992 N.C. District Director for the Carolina Alumni board, and committee member for the Tar Heel Network.
A lifelong Presbyterian, Lila attended Shenandoah Presbyterian Church in her youth. She first attended Camp Montreat for Girls around 1942 and enjoyed the Presbyterian conference center the rest of her life. She became an Elder at First Presbyterian Church in Lincolnton and lived a life of deep faith, courage, peace, kindness and love.
Lila was predeceased by her parents, Karl and Lila Ponder; her husband, the Hon. John Ralph Friday; her brother, John Oliver Ponder (Lucretia); and daughter, Susan Friday Lamb. She is survived by daughter, Sarah Friday Peters, and husband Alexander McClure Peters; son-in-law Terrell Hadley Lamb; four grandchildren — Elizabeth Lamb Poindexter (Matthew), Emily Lamb Viva (Matthew), John Walker Peters and Lila McClure Peters; three great-grandchildren — Cora Watts Poindexter, Mary Friday Poindexter and Graham Alexander Viva; and extended family.
A Service of Witness to the Resurrection will be held at 10 a.m. on Saturday, Jan. 27, 2024, at West Raleigh Presbyterian Church, 27 Horne St., Raleigh, N.C., 27607. A reception will follow. A graveside service will be held at 1 p.m., February 19 at Hollybrook Cemetery, Lincolnton, N.C.
In lieu of flowers, memorials may be made to West Raleigh Presbyterian Church, to the UNC-Chapel Hill Department of English & Comparative Literature or to the N.C. Museum of History Foundation.
Posted on 25 Jan 2024
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